And You Guys Thought the Witch Had Disappeared!

I'm baaaaaaccccckkkkkk!

A bout with iron-deficiency anemia has left this particular mountain witch feeling drained and looking like a reject from Interview with a Vampire. Let me tell you, the pale skin I inherited from my English ancestors has ever been the bane of my existence to begin with--why, oh why, couldn't I have been born with the pretty bronze color of my Cherokee heritage?--but add the sallow complexion that comes with anemia...IT AIN'T PRETTY! However, iron supplements have helped, even though they taste like I'm gnawing on nails.

And now, I want to give a big SHOUT OUT to my fellow Heffas! Annette, stop working so hard and go get a mani/pedi! Sunny, love ya, woman, and if the kids get to you, I have your back! Kathi, the reptile woman, I think you ought to write a book, a soap opera of Freya and Oden's love story! Amy, one of the strongest women I know, you and your husband and all military families are in my thoughts and prayers every day. Soli, I hope you get that teaching job on the rez...you are the perfect one for it! Amber, I love what you do for the kids in your district. You rock! Megan, you are my favorite tech geek of all time...I know exactly whom to ask if I ever need computer help. Monica, you are THE Americorps chick of the year! Jess, Photographer of The Weave, Protectress of Children, you rock, too! Cassie, I'm so glad you are a Heffa...you've come a long way the past year...love ya! Amanda, you crazy doctor's wife...go get some Chinese take-out, will ya? And give that adorable baby a hug! Tina, I am so glad you lost your filter...you crack me up, girl! Stephanie and "MissWeezer"...you guys aren't around as much, but I love it when you are...you both rock, too!

Okay, it's fabulous to have a group of girlfriends that a mountain witch can turn to, especially when one's offspring are acting like buttmunches, as mine have been the last several days. Oh yes, those ADORABLE offspring of the darling Czech Pecker. That's right...they're his kids right now. I think I'll let him have them for a while, and I'll float around the house in ignorant bliss. Kids? What kids? Do I have kids? No way!

Speaking of the little Czech monsters, I looked at the calendar today, and it hit me...it's the end of the school year already! Holy flying crapmonkeys! Where has the time gone? J.P.'s school sent a notice out that they are going to start a school band next school year for grades 3rd and up. Naturally, he is all over that. Not only does he want to continue playing drums for the Fife and Drum Corps, playing his electric guitar that he got for Christmas, now he wants to play the trumpet. Oh dear patron saint of mothers who suffer from headaches due to children who play music turned up to 11, please pray for me. I do believe that I will be keeping the pharmaceutical industry in business, most notably the company that produces Relpax, my migraine meds.

On that note, there is a cheesecake in the kitchen calling my name. I have been trying to resist it because I know that cheesecake, like most things that taste good, likes to stick to my butt, and yet, its siren call is luring me ever nearer to the refrigerator...